Just Looking for a Way to Blow Off Some Steam

An article by posted on August 30, 2007

After the Mets (and our) recent nightmare yesterday, many thoughts raced through my mind as to what my blog should be about today. I would really like to stay cheery and positive, but it would just feel like I’m being phony. So I have decided to go the route of a “fake it till you make it” attitude and just do something completely random and nonsensical…which happens to be a specialty of mine. That being said, here it is…my cast of Mets and their most hated rivals if they were cast for Star Wars, complete with movie quotes.

The Rebel Alliance(Mets)

Jose Reyes as Luke Skywalker – Confident, young and gifted, I can almost hear him say, “I used to bulls eye womp rats in my T-16 back home. They’re not much bigger than two meters.”, when faced with an impossible task.

David Wright as Han Solo- The handsome, swashbuckling, get the girl type(or girls in Wrights’ case!) and leader of the good guys. Always one of the first to give his mates a pat on the back. “Great shot, kid, that was one in a million!”

Paul LoDuca as Chewbacca- Okay, what he lacks in height in this role, Paulie makes up for it with a ferocity and passion that are unmatched on the team. It’s probably a good thing he isn’t 7 feet tall and hairy, or there wouldn’t be any teams left to play! As Han told C3PO as R2D2 was beating Chewbacca in a board game,” That’s ’cause droids don’t pull people’s arms out of their
sockets when they lose.”

The Empire(Everyone else)

George Steinbrenner as Emperor Palpatine- Old, wrinkly, scary and armed with a seemingly endless supply of money, he is the symbol of all things evil. He uses his money to hire the best rogues, whiners and over the hill superstars it can buy. All in the name of another division title or to finish ahead of Boston. I believe Obi- Wan put it best about the Bronx when he said,” Mos Eisley spaceport: You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. We must be cautious.”

Roger Clemens as Darth Vader- A shadow of his former self, there actually used to be some good in Clemens before the influence of Emperor Steinbrenner caused him to turn to the dark side and throw not once, but twice at our beloved Mike Piazza. If we were to ask what made him sign with the Skankees I bet he would say,” You don’t know the power of the dark side. I MUST obey my master!”(Meaning the lure of money and Georgie.)

Hope this made you smile if nothing else…May the force be with you! (And the Mets too!)

Come check me out on MySpace at http://www.myspace.com/uncleaddy

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