With the month of September being National Suicide Awareness Month, many people in the sports media world have been speaking out on how mental illness and suicide has affected them in their lives.

As someone who has struggled with their own mental health for over a decade, I wanted to write this piece as a thank you to both the Mets and all the people I have met through writing about them. In all honesty, I’m happier now and my life would never be the same without them.

The first thing anyone who finds out that I’m a Mets fan says to me is usually along the lines of, “you’re supporting the wrong New York team.” To them, the success of a franchise determines which team they support.

It makes sense, for pretty much its entire existence, the New York Mets franchise has lived in the shadow of their Bronx rivals due to the vast difference in performance. But ask any Mets fan, and they will tell you that the Amazins are not exactly your typical baseball team.

The Mets have become a safe haven for fans alike, building a solid community of a wide range of people, all of whom bleed orange and blue. I am one of those people.

As difficult as it may be to put into words, I’m going to do my best to convey to you the effect this ragtag team has had on my life, as they essentially saved it.

I grew up in a small town about nine miles east of Flushing, Queens where you’ll find the home of the Mets — Citi Field.

Luckily, I was just a short drive or train ride away from a baseball game whenever the Mets were playing at home.

I was never unfamiliar with baseball, my Grandfather had season tickets at the Polo Grounds and my brother has been a die-hard fan his whole life, but the baseball-fever gene never really took hold of me.

That was until my senior year of high school, when my mom was diagnosed with an aggressive form of stage two inflammatory breast cancer. That’s when my whole life changed.

Due to my dad passing away when I was ten, I had spent most of my adolescence in and out of mental hospitals with diagnoses ranging from depression and anxiety to PTSD.

So when my mom got sick I shut down. I stopped living my life, only going through the motions, and not wanting to do even that. That was until one day, I got a hold of some cheap tickets to a frigid April Mets game from my friends.

But as fate would have it, my friends ended up deciding the cold weather was too much for them so I was on my own.

I knew I couldn’t stay home that night, especially given everything I was battling in my head. So I made the trek to the train station and took the LIRR to Willets Point, where I ended up watching the Mets rally to defeat the Washington Nationals 11-5.

Things were actually looking ever so bleak for the Mets up until the eighth inning. That’s when they scored some runs to even up the game and eventually taking a 7-4 lead. The Mets would then break the game wide open with a grand slam from Yoenis Cespedes, giving them a big lopsided victory.

The energy in Citi Field that night was enough to spark the motivation I needed to keep going.

Between the rumbling of the ballpark and the cheers of the fans I was invigorated. I found a place, where I knew that no matter how alone I felt in the world, if I was at Citi Field, I had at least one thing in common with everyone there and that feeling, even now, is so powerful words cannot do it justice.

That season, I went to 28 home games, and even on the days that the Mets lost, I didn’t seem to mind so much because I was with people who felt the same way I did. Plus all the walk-off wins and late game rallies made it all worth it.

During the 2019 season, I went to 18 home games, however on one occasion when I was home from college, it was another rough time in my life as I lost a friend to suicide. Yet again, the Mets pulled me through and helped me remember what I was living for.

The feeling at Citi Field in late August of 2019, was electric. The Mets seemed to walk off games in their sleep as the summer city breeze engulfed the park, being there, at that park during those games felt like something out of a movie, making me feel at peace for the first time in months.

I still get sardonic comments from fans of other teams about my Mets Fandom but I just smile and shrug it off. And while it’s definitely not easy being a Mets fan and very gut-wrenching at times, I wouldn’t trade my love for the Mets, or any of the friendships I’ve built because of it,  for the world.

The community of people that the Mets have brought me are some of the most supportive, funniest, kindest group of people I’ve ever been graced with.

Because of this team, I know that even on the most difficult of days I still have things to look forward to and people who will support my endeavors in doing so.

I’m now an Emergency Medical Technician, a nursing student, and I operate my own small business.

Additionally, I have started a mental health organization as a space to educate and advocate for college students who are struggling with their mental health.

So thank you to both the New York Mets and all their fans that I have met along the way, for helping me get to a place where I was able to accomplish all that I have in the past few years. I’m forever grateful.