4
2012
How To Fix The Mets According To The Movies
An article by 
The four things the Mets have to do this off-season to keep the Moneyball project going strong according to the movies…
1. Hire Jonah Hill immediately to assist Sandy Alderson in the front office.
2. Trade Ike Davis.
Find a guy with nerve damage in his throwing arm to play first base.
Why? Because walks are better than 30+ home runs.
3. Adopt Norman Dale’s “hoosiers” philosophy when up at the plate.
Norman Dale didn’t want his Huskers shooting until they passed the ball four times. In similar fashion, the Mets would like their hitters seeing more pitches. They will make it mandatory that every Met player takes at least one strike before swinging the bat in 2013. If a player violates this rule, they will get benched, even if it means playing with 8.
4. Bring Kelly Leak out of retirement to play an outfield position.
With all the very serious things being written about what the Mets, I felt it was necessary to have some fun with the situation. With all the off-season concerns, it seems like we are all beating a dead horse at this point. Everyone knows the problems the Mets are facing, and it’s going to be a tough pill to swallow if we don’t see the Mets taking steps over the winter to improve the situation.
I, for one, am glad the season is over. I need a break, and I am sure many other Mets fans feel the same way. I wouldn’t expect any major changes coming this winter either. The Mets aren’t going to throw money at free-agents, and they don’t have much trade bait.
The 2013 Mets are going to look very similar to the 2012 Mets.
Let’s not get discouraged as fans though. Let’s look at what the Orioles and Athletics were able to do this year, and have some faith in the Mets for 2013. Everyone starts with a clean slate and in first place on day one. Maybe in thinking that way, we will be able to sleep better at night this winter.
About the Author: Mitch Petanick
8 Comments + Add Comment
NL East Standings
| Team | W | L | Pct. | GB |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Braves | 42 | 28 | .600 | - |
| Nationals | 34 | 35 | .493 | 7.5 |
| Phillies | 34 | 37 | .479 | 8.5 |
| Mets | 25 | 40 | .385 | 14.5 |
| Marlins | 22 | 47 | .319 | 19.5 |
Last updated: 06/18/2013
Recent Comments
- Hank: on Wheeler Deals, Mets Sweep Braves In Nightcap, 6-1: Fingers crossed the kid keep dealin' for...
- XtreemIcon: on Mets Acquire Eric Young Jr. For Collin McHugh, DFA Cowgill and Promote Brown: I'm pretty sure McHugh is reporting to...
- sarge69: on Mets Acquire Eric Young Jr. For Collin McHugh, DFA Cowgill and Promote Brown: Why? According to MLB sources, he is average...
- DrDooby: on Atchison Leaves Game With Sore Right Groin: It clears a roster spot for the...
- Jason bay: on Wheeler Deals, Mets Sweep Braves In Nightcap, 6-1: No doubt there are some disappointed Mets...
Latest From Mets Minors
Check Out These Great MLB Links!
Photographs From Gordon Donovan
Fans Follow Us On Twitter!
1332 Fans Like Us On Facebook!
2341 Fans Read Our Feed!
1702 Fans Subscribe via Daily Email!
I would have liked to have seen Mr. 3000 Stan Ross or Mr. Baseball Jack Elliott at 1B. Bring in The Rocket Chet Steadmond, while you’re at it bring Rosenbagger (yes I meant it that way) as the closer and Willie Hays Mays to patrol the OF with Bennie the Jet Rodriguez pinch running.
Instead it feels like we are stuck with Lupus in RF, Ogilvie on the mound, Smalls in CF.
If they get rid of Wright I’m afraid we’ll be left with “Ed” at 3B.
Of course, in Trouble With the Curve, the Braves and Red Sox have bigger problems than the Mets.
Too Funny Mitch…
What we see going on here is the classic case of attempting to CORPORATIZE the way a baseball team is run.
DIRECTIVES regarding Batting and Pitching are handed down from Corporate HQ and the coaches who on most teams set the baseball agenda are mitigated to nothing more than Corporate managers who see to it that corporate edicts are followed.
This is why a guy who hits 32 HRs is under fire as not getting with the program and those who fail to follow the corporate gospel will find themselves marginalized and even sold off (traded in this case) since they are considered corporate assets that don’t fit the corporate mindset.
It happens all the time in regular business and is usually the cause of those business’ folding and going bankrupt.
Because it looks good to guys who get paid a lot but have no practical experience but it works out good on thier spreadsheet and thats all corporate directors care about.
By the time it fails they made thier money and move onto the next sucker that will buy their philosophy.
As long as they don’t have a life size poster that they peel of pieces to reveal a pic of Fred in a bikini…
Maybe they should just sneak in to CityField every night and turn the sprinklers on…you can’t lose if you don’t play.
Better woul be to have a naked cutout of Fred and for each win they get a piece of clothing to cover him up!
Ah, if we could only get these guys from the movies -
Babe Ruth (The Babe Ruth Story)
Lou Gehrig (Pride Of The Yankees)
Dizzy Dean (The Pride OF St Louis)
Jackie Robinson (The Jackie Robinson Story)
Grover Cleveland Alexander (The Winning Team)
Ty Cobb (Cobb)
Satchel Paige (Don’t Look Back)
Roger Maris (*61)
Jimmy Piersal (Fear Strikes Out) – only Met to have his biography on film!
Would be quite a clubhouse with Robinson taking no crap from Cobb, Dizzy Dean talking pitching with Satchel Paige and the extroverted Babe Ruth defying Sandy Alderson and his approach to hitting!
…. or I’d even just settle for re-hiring the now ex-Red Sox Manager Bobby Valentine since he would be perfect for the role of Aloysius X. ‘Guffy’ McGovern, played by Paul Douglas in the original “Angels In The Outfield” – the foul mouthed manager who began hearing the voice of an angel promising to help his pathetic team win if he would just mend his ways.
***** forgot to add our catcher, Roy Campenalla (It’s Good To Be Alive).
Tom Berringer behind the dish? even now he sounds better than Thole lol. I for one hate the offseason. I miss watching baseball. I of course love to speculate and throw my worthless opinion round here and there and hope for an “I told you so” moment lol. Funny article, good job manno.